Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom.
Because he never f*cks up.
Vote:
This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He
decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her.
When he looked in his
mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing
herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man"
So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again,
but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it
out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in
bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his
clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I
need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
Vote:
How do you make a woman scream twice in the bedroom?
Fuck her in the ass then wipe your dick on the curtains.
Vote:
A young couple get between the sheets for the first time.
In a flash it’s over.
The boy says, ‘If I’d known you were a virgin I’d have taken more time.’
His girlfriend replies, ‘If I’d known you were going to take more time I’d have taken off my tights.’
Why don’t women blink during foreplay?
They don’t have time.
A father notices his young son staring at something on the ground.
The father approaches his son and asks what he's looking at.
The boy says that he sees two daddy long legs on top of each other, and asks what they're doing.
They father replies that the two spiders are having sex.
It's a completely natural thing that a mommy and daddy do when they love each other.
The son then asks if one is a daddy long leg and the other is a mommy long leg.
The father says that they're both daddy long legs.
The son stomps on them, killing them.
The father asks why he did that.
The boy replies "I don't want any of that faggot-ass shit in my yard."
She’s got her very own method of birth control.
She takes her make-up off.
What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man.
Is it still rape if you yell 'Surprise!' first?
Vote:
Small boy to friend: ‘What would you do if a girl kissed you?’
Friend: ‘I’d kiss her back. What would you do?’
Small boy: ‘I’d kiss her front.’