Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes.
They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "Ok we can run for it or we can stay here and out number them."
And the other rabbit says, "We're going to run for it you idiot I'm your brother."
Two sperm are in the body looking for the egg when one of them starts to wonder why it is taking so long.
He asks the other sperm, "aren't we near the uterus yet?"
"No," replied the other sperm, "we haven't even gotten to the esophagus."
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.
‘During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me.
Just the other night she called me from a hotel.’
Rodney Dangerfield
Yo mama's so fat when she is having sex, her partner doesen't know if it's in her butt or her boobs.
My girlfriend always laughs during sex – no matter what she’s reading.
So God is getting a bit bored in heaven, and he asks his archangel Michael, "Michael, I need to get away from it all for a bit. Where should I go to clear my head?"
Michael replies, "Well, you could always go to Pluto. You could go create a mountain and ski, have a bit of fun."
God says, "No, I don't think so. I don't do so well with the cold, and frostbite was definitely not one of my better creations."
The archangels says, "Alright, well you could always try Mercury. It's nice and warm, you could just take a bit of time to relax, get a nice tan."
"Michael," God says, "do you see how white I am? I would burn to a crisp."
Michael replies, "Alright, well then why don't you go to Earth?"
"Fuck that," God says, "last time I went there I got some girl pregnant and I never heard the end of it."
‘I believe that sex between two people is a beautiful experience.
Between five it’s fantastic!’
Woody Allen
‘Sex for an old guy is a bit like shooting pool with a rope.’
George Burns