The best sex jokes

My girlfriend likes to pretend to be a 14 year old when we have sex. I don't get it she will be 14 in a few years anyway.
has 52.52 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: sex
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, health, sex
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
has 52.50 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: sex
Peter approaches the gates of Heaven. "Knock knock," says Peter. Miraculously, someone answers him. "Who's there," a voice in the distance asked. "God," says Peter. "God who," asked the voice? "GOD DAMMIT open these gates! I've been a good neighbor, loved my wife and lost my virginity, twice!"
has 52.50 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, heaven, knock-knock, sex
Question master: ‘In the Garden of Eden, what were the first words Eve said to Adam?’ Contestant: ‘Gosh, that’s a hard one!’ Question master: ‘Well done. Two points.’
has 52.45 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex? A. Locking the car door.
has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, sex
A German woman is walking down the street. Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her. She screams, "Nein!, Nein" So two guys walk away.
has 52.23 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: blonde, communication, ethnic, sex, stupid
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her idea of safe sex is to lock the car doors.
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: car, sex, Yo mama
What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? S&M&M.
has 52.10 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: sex
This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her. When he looked in his mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man" So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again, but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
has 52.06 % from 186 votes. More jokes about: age, masturbation, sex
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