The best sex jokes

Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
has 52.63 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Fathers day, kids, sex, single, women
My girlfriend likes to pretend to be a 14 year old when we have sex. I don't get it she will be 14 in a few years anyway.
has 52.52 % from 120 votes. More jokes about: sex
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
has 52.50 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What's the difference between acne and a Roman Catholic Priest from the Vatican? A: Acne would wait until you're at least 13 before it would cum on your face!
has 52.46 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: age, catholic, dirty, priest, sex
Question master: ‘In the Garden of Eden, what were the first words Eve said to Adam?’ Contestant: ‘Gosh, that’s a hard one!’ Question master: ‘Well done. Two points.’
has 52.45 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex? A. Locking the car door.
has 52.38 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, sex
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her idea of safe sex is to lock the car doors.
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: car, sex, Yo mama
What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? S&M&M.
has 52.10 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: sex
This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her. When he looked in his mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man" So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again, but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
has 52.06 % from 186 votes. More jokes about: age, masturbation, sex
Murphy the bus driver is sitting in his cab when his supervisor comes along. ‘Hello, Murphy,’ he says. ‘What time did you pull out this morning?’ ‘I didn’t,’ replies Murphy. ‘And I’ve been worrying about it all day.’
has 51.88 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: sex
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