The best sport jokes

Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
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has 70.01 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in London. The Brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus. The Blonde team rides on the top level. The Brunette team down below is living it up having a great time, when one of them realises she doesn't hear anything from the Blondes upstairs. She decides to go up and investigate. When the Brunette reaches the top, she finds all the Blondes frozen in fear, staring straight-ahead at the road, and clutching the seats in front of them with white knuckles. She says, "What the heck's going on up here? We're havin' a grand time downstairs!" One of the Blondes looks up and says, "Yeah, but you've got a driver!"
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has 69.86 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: sport
An American automobile company and a Japanese auto company decided to have a competitive boat race on the Detroit River. Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance. On the big day, they were as ready as they could be. The Japanese team won by a mile. Afterwards, the American team became discouraged by the loss and their morale sagged. Corporate management decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found. A Continuous Measurable Improvement Team of "Executives" was set up to investigate the problem and to recommend appropriate corrective action. Their conclusion: The problem was that the Japanese team had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, whereas the American team had 1 person rowing and 8 people steering. The American Corporate Steering Committee immediately hired a consulting firm to do a study on the management structure. After some time and billions of dollars, the consulting firm concluded that "too many people were steering and not enough rowing." To prevent losing to the Japanese again next year, the management structure was changed to "4 Steering Managers, 3 Area Steering Managers, and 1 Staff Steering Manager" and a new performance system for the person rowing the boat to give more incentive to work harder and become a six sigma performer. "We must give him empowerment and enrichment." That ought to do it. The next year the Japanese team won by two miles. The American Corporation laid off the rower for poor performance, sold all of the paddles, cancelled all capital investments for new equipment, halted development of a new canoe, awarded high performance awards to the consulting firm, and distributed the money saved as bonuses to the senior executives.
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has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: management, money, sport, technology, time
Julia began her job in a secondary school as a counselor and she was keen to help the pupils. One day during break-time she noticed a girl standing all by herself on one side of the playing field while the rest of the children were enjoying a game of soccer at the other end of the field. Julia approached and asked if she was all right. The girl said that she was. Some time later, however, Julia noticed that the girl was in exactly the same spot, still by herself. Going up to her again, she enquired, 'Would you like me to be your friend?' The girl hesitated, then said, 'Alright,' while looking at Julia with some suspicion. Feeling she was making progress, Julia then asked, 'Why are you standing here all alone?' 'Because,' the girl said with a large sigh, 'I'm the goalie!'
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has 69.47 % from 213 votes. More jokes about: school, sport, work
Yo Mama so fat when Flash tried to run around her he died before he got half way.
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has 69.28 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: death, fat, sport, Yo mama
Q: What's the worst thing about being lonely? A: Playing Frisbee.
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has 68.80 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: single, sport
Q: What's the difference between hockey player and hippie girl? A: Hockey player will take shower after 3 periods.
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has 68.66 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, sport
Paddy asks Murphy, 'Why do scuba divers fall off their boats backwards?" Murphy replies, "If they fell forwards they'd still be on the f*cking boat!"
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has 68.56 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: sport
What does tightrope walking and getting a blowjob from Grandma have in common? You don't look down.
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has 68.50 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: age, dirty, old people, sport
Q: Why there are many bubbles on the pool's water? A: Swimmers are farting.
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has 68.49 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, sport