The best stupid jokes

Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.

I asked the boss if I could get a raise, and he said, "Because of the fluctuational predisposition of your position's productive capacity as juxtaposed to the industry standards, it would be monetarily injudicious to advocate an increment." I said, "I don't get it." He said, "That's right."

A brunette and a blonde are walking in the park. The brunette asks: "Hey can you see that forest over there?" The blonde looks that way and answers: "I can't, the trees are covering the view."

Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!

A blonde's house is on fire. She runs outside and yells, "Help me! My house is on fire! What do I do?!" Someone else yells, "Call 911!" The blonde yells back, "What's the number?"

When my customer ordered iced tea, I asked, "Sweetened or unsweetened?" Her answer: "What's the difference?"

Client: "Please remove the unnecessary circle at the end of the sentence." Me: "You mean... the period?" Client: "I don't care what you designers call it; it is unsightly. Delete it."

Jill: "How did you find the weather on your vacation?" Bill: "I just went outside and there it was!"

Two dyslectic fellas sat in the kitchen... Fella 1: "Ere, can you smell gas?" Fella 2: "Who me? No... I can't even smell my own name!"

Pritam is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway when he spots his friend Shankar standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Shankar is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. Pritam gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Shankar and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?" Shankar replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks Pritam, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are outstanding in their field."