Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram
Yo mama so stupid that when she turned on airplane mode... She thought she could fly.
Chuck Norris has a website, is called the internet.
Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. Steve Martin
Two little boys go into the grocery store. One is nine, one is four. The nine year old grabs a box of tampons from the shelf and carries it to the register for check-out. The cashier asks "Oh, these must be for your mom, huh?" The nine year old replies "Nope, not for my mom." Without thinking, the cashier responded "Well, they must be for your sister then?" The nine year old quipped, "Nope, not for my sister either." The cashier had now become curious "Oh. Not for your mom and not for your sister, who are they for?" The nine year old says "They’re for my four year old little brother." The cashier is surprised "Your four year old little brother?" The nine year old explains: "Well yeah, they say on TV if you wear one of these you can swim or ride a bike and my little brother can’t do either of them!"
Yo' Mama's head is so big, she dreams in IMAX.
Q: What will my computer printer warranty cover? A: Your mouse pad.
Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.
I just saw a mexjcan guy walking down the street with a tv and I thought " wow, that looks just like mine." But I knew mine was at home shining my shoes.