The best technology jokes

Roses are red, violets are blue. Pornhub is Down, your mums Facebook will do.
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has 58.16 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: dirty, Facebook, poems, technology, Yo mama
It was Valentine's day and Jim and Danielle's first date. They sat in the darkened cinema waiting for the film to start. The screen finally lit up with a flashy advertisement for the cinema's concession stand. Jim and Danielle realised that there was no sound. The film began but the silence continued. Suddenly, out of the darkness, an irritated voice in the crowd loudly shouted, "Okay, who's got the remote control?"
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has 58.09 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dating, technology, Valentines day
I had to get an Xbox controller tattooed on my vagina. So my boyfriend would play with me for a change.
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has 58.01 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: dirty, technology
Mom! I'm a 3D printer! Oh come on, Tommy, close the door when you poop.
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has 57.54 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, kids, technology
One day there were two men. One was driving a Mercedes Benz and the other was riding a horse, both waiting at the traffic light. The man in the Benz looked at the horse and noticed something different, that horse was not a normal horse. It was an electric horse and has 3 buttons in it if you press one button it moves forward, if you press the second button it moves faster and if you press the last button it will stop. The guy in the Benz was really impressed, so he asked the guy riding the horse if he wanted to trade the horse for the Benz, so he agreed. They did the trade and the guy riding the horse drove the Benz and went on his way but the other guy was still stuck in the traffic light trying to get the horse to move. He tried all the buttons but the horse does not seem to be moving so he called the horse owner and asked him if he can come back to show him how to move the horse. So the guy came back, he pressed all the buttons again but the horse still doesn't move. He noticed the horse's penis was up so he tells the other guy: "Ohh you forgot to release the handbrake!"
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has 57.27 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: car, dirty, horse, men, technology
Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy. Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money. "I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!"
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, money, technology
What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus? A dead wringer.
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: IT, technology
My New Years resolution is 1080p.
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has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: new year, technology
Q: What is fast and crunchy? A: A rocket chip.
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: technology
A blonde walks into a electronic store and asks the manager, “Can I buy that TV” “No” “Why not?” “Because your a blonde.” So the blonde goes out and dyes her hair red. She returned to the electronic store and said, “Can I buy that TV?” “No” “Why not?” “Your a blonde.” So the blonde goes and shaves her hair off and returns to the electronic store and says, “Can I buy that TV?” “No” “Why not?” “You’re a blonde” “How can you tell I’m a blonde, I dyed my hair red, then shaved it off!” “Because that’s not a TV, that’s a microwave!”
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has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: blonde, customer service, technology
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