That recent tsunami was caused when Chuck Norris dropped a pebble into the ocean.
PlayStation network was never hacked. Chuck Norris just decided to play one day.
Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram
Jimmy is calling Sergey, who he met at an international conference. Jimmy: "Hi, I've hear there is minus 54 degrees Celsius." Sergey: "Nonsense, not even minus 15!" Jimmy: "But on CNN, they've just shown a thermometer..." Sergey: "Ohh, ok, maybe outside."
I had to get an Xbox controller tattooed on my vagina. So my boyfriend would play with me for a change.
My girlfriend has incredible sexual skills. I almost had a heart attack when I saw the video!
There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible. Steve Martin
Chuck Norris has no need for a TV remote. He stares at his television, until it changes the channel.
Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
Yo' Mama's head is so big, she dreams in IMAX.