Q: What do you call a terrorist attack in the Middle East?
A: A Selfie!
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With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
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What do you call a bent iPhone 6 plus?
A dead wringer.
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My New Years resolution is 1080p.
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Q: What do builders use to make websites?
A: Com.crete.
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Q: What is fast and crunchy?
A: A rocket chip.
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Q: What do u do when your sitting in the dark and your tv starts to float?
A: You turn on the lights and shoot the black people.
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1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female......Any part under a car's hood.
Male........The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female......Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male........Playing football without a cup.
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female......The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male........Leaving a note before taking off for a weekend with the boys.
4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment)
Female.......A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male.........Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.
5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.v.
Female......A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male........Anything that can be done while drinking, and ends with sex.
6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female......An embarrassing by-product of digestion.
Male........A source of entertainment, self-statement and male bonding.
7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female......The greatest statement of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male........Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.
8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.......A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male.........A device for scanning through all 175 channels every 5 minutes.
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Joke has 56.41 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: car, communication, football, marriage, technology
What do you get if you cross a Kindle with an Apple iPhone 4S?
4Skin.
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Jimmy is calling Sergey, who he met at an international conference.
Jimmy: "Hi, I've hear there is minus 54 degrees Celsius."
Sergey: "Nonsense, not even minus 15!"
Jimmy: "But on CNN, they've just shown a thermometer..."
Sergey: "Ohh, ok, maybe outside."
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