Chuck Norris once raced light. He is still waiting for it to catch up.
What are Women Really Thinking? So many men, so few who can afford me. Coffee, chocolate, men ... some things are just better rich. Don't treat me any differently than you would the Queen. Guys have feelings too, But ... who cares? And your point is? Next mood swing: 6 minutes. If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
If I've invested precious time and energy in a relationship, and I've been honest and open, hanging and coping, true blue, a good screw, to some fly guy who's out constantly getting high, then I'm dumped suicide is not one of my thoughts. I'm thinking maybe homicide.
Q: What does a blond man do at 03.00 in the night naked at the balcony? A: The blond girl told him to come outside
15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest? I don't know he is still busy.
Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.
In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague. The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
Chuck Norris hit you tomorrow, is going to hit you yesterday, and you're now dead.
Yo Mama's so stupid because it too her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Q: Why can women play hockey? A: Because they have to change their pads after every period.