Q: What's the difference between killing time and killing niggers? A: You can only kill so much time.
Why does a man like love at first sight? It saves them a lot of time.
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
Yo momma's so fat; she's in two time zones at the same time!
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to change the past. He has never made any mistakes.
What does a nigger do after sex? 25 years to life.
They were married, but since the argument they had a few days earlier, they hadn't been talking to each other. Instead, they were giving each other written notes. One evening he gave her a paper where it said: "Wake me up tomorrow morning at 6 am." The next morning he woke up and saw that it was 9 o'clock. Naturally he got very angry, but as he turned around he found a note on his pillow saying: "Wake up, it's 6 o'clock!"
In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris. The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
The world ends on December 21st, 2012. Only because that's when Chuck Norris masters the Falco Punch.