The best time jokes

Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
has 31.45 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, cowboy, time
Chuck Norris once rode a bull, and nine months later it had a calf.
has 31.25 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, cowboy, time
Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay? A. They don't have time.
has 31.10 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: men, sex, time, women
It's legal to earn money playing hockey Many people play hockey even after they're married The puck's always hard The protective equipment is reusable It lasts at least an hour A two-on-one or a three-on-one is not uncommon You always know how big the stick is You can clean your stick in public without anyone minding You can change players on the fly You don't have to be embarrassed if you don't get the puck up Everyone is finished when the buzzer sounds Your parents cheer when you score Periods last only 20 minutes You're sure to get it at least twice a week You can tell your friends about it afterwards.
has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: marriage, money, sport, time
"Johny, please, tell us, what do you do the whole day, so?" "So, in the morning I cut the wood, sometimes with both hands, 5 minutes a day I play the guitar, to tell the truth. And in the afternoon I go to my garden to water the flowers. The lilies of the valleys and may-flowers I water most likely. Yes, they are really cute. Then I tear the leaflets to find out if the neighbor (her husband is not at home) loves me or not. The last time it came out that she loves me, fuck."
has 30.82 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, love, music, time
The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
has 30.80 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food, time
Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
has 30.77 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
has 30.77 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music, time
Q: What do you tell someone you didn't see at New Year's Eve? A: I haven't seen you for a year!
has 30.77 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: black humor, new year, time
In my village, it is not usual, ordinary, even normal that somebody would go to work. Even though there is one person in our village who goes to work on a regular basis. In the morning when he goes to work the whole village accompanies him, men, women, children, grannies and grandpas and in the evening when he goes back from work the whole village welcomes him back. We all are smiling at him and we are waving at him with the bunches of purple lilac flowers for example during this period of time, April, May.
has 30.77 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: family, time, work
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