The best time jokes

Four year-old Harry, who could tell time, was playing with a wall clock when her grandpa visited. Later, when he was putting on his coat to leave, the grandpa asked him what time it was. He looked at the clock blankly, and then answered in a triumphant way, "It's time for you to go, grandpa!"
has 30.43 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: kids, time
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and its still printing.
has 30.11 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, fat, technology, time, Yo mama
What fits your schedule better...... Exercising 1 hour a day or being fat 24 hours a day?
has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: fat, time
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
has 29.66 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, travel
In an attempt to end WWII, President Harry Truman had Chuck Norris parachuted into Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Sept. 2, 1945, the Japanese surrendered.
has 29.23 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, war
A lecturer who was drunk walked in a class. Ater few minutes he wanted to urinate, he ran out and open a zip slowly, so that he may urinate. After urinating, that's when he realized that the zip he opened was for a jacket.
has 29.10 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: dirty, drunk, school, stupid, time
One man enters in an ambulant and says to the doctor: - Help me, please. I have a knife in my back. The doctor, looking his watch says: - Now is 2:20 PM, and I work till 2, so as you can imagine I've finished for today, and I can’t help you. Be so kind and come tomorrow morning, at 8. - But tomorrow morning I will be dead. You must help me now. The doctor, angrily says: - I explained to you gently that I've finished my shift for today, and that I can't do nothing for you. You must pass here tomorrow. - But, until tomorrow I will lose all my blood, and I will be dead. Don’t you see that I have a knife in the back. The doctor, already very angry and irritate extracts the knife from the back, and put it in the patients’ eye. - Now you can go to ophthalmologist, he works till 3 PM.
has 28.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, doctor, time
Chuck Norris traveled around the world in 60 milliseconds.
has 28.82 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, travel
There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.
has 27.58 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, life, science, time
Q. What does a blonde do if she is not in bed by 10? A. She picks up her purse and goes home.
has 26.98 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: blonde, time
More jokes →
Page 51 of 53.