Yo mama so ugly that her mom only fed her with a sling shot.
Kid: "Mom, am I ugly?" Mom: "I told you not to call me mom in public."
You know you're ugly when you get handed the camera every time they make a group photo.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, when she walked past the toilet, it flushed itself.
I have a bumper sticker saying, "Honk if you think I'm sexy". Some days I just stand at a green light till I'm feeling good about myself.
Two blondes were talking together: First: "How about your engaged Jim? Is he keeping well?" Second: "He isn't just now my engaged." First: Hi good news. His nose was too big and his head was bald with an ugly face!" Second: "He is now my husband!"
Yo mammas so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, her reflection said," I quit." And walked away.
Yo mama so ugly when she takes baths water hops out.
Yo mama so ugly when she went to sleep Freddy Krueger was scared of her.
Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says, "I hear that you’ve been telling people that I’m ugly!" "Oh NO! I’ve just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look less attractive." "I also heard that you’ve been calling me fat?" "Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you look larger than you really are." "I’ve also heard that you’re saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!" "Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"