Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
Going to war without the French is like going hunting without your accordion.
In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
The war with Japan would have ended sooner, but the allies decided that dropping Chuck Norris on Hiroshima would be a crime against humanity.
During the Iraq war, a Lieutenant asked the soldier why he was falling back during a really fierce battle, "Didn't you hear me say that we're outnumbered 4 to 1 ?" The soldier replied, "I got my four Sir."
Hiroshima nagasaki was nothing but the result of chuck norris skydiving in Japan.
During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured. For torture, they made him eat his own entrails. He asked for seconds.
Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
How does an octopus go to war? Well-armed.