The best war jokes

How does an octopus go to war? Well-armed.
Vote: has 51.61 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, war
During the Iraq War, As a soldier was saying good-bye to his family, his five-year-old son, James, held his leg and started pleading not to leave. "No, Daddy, please don't go!" he kept repeating. They were beginning to make a scene when his wife, desperate to calm him, said, "Let Daddy go and I'll take you to get a pizza." Immediately, James loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said, "'Bye, Daddy."
Vote: has 50.88 % from 62 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: family, food, kids, military, war
World War II started because Burger King screwed up Chuck Norris' order. Today Burger King NEVER gives you onions unless you ask for them.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
Vote: has 48.41 % from 39 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, military, war
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
Vote: has 46.70 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, war
Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 42.06 % from 36 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, military, war
Yo mamas so fat that she fought a war with her own farts.
Vote: has 41.83 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: fart, fat, war, Yo mama
In an attempt to end WWII, President Harry Truman had Chuck Norris parachuted into Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Sept. 2, 1945, the Japanese surrendered.
Vote: has 41.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, war
Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
Vote: has 39.94 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, celebrity, Chuck Norris, war
What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns? A bull pull.
Vote: has 39.64 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, war


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