The best war jokes

During the Iraq war, a Lieutenant asked the soldier why he was falling back during a really fierce battle, "Didn't you hear me say that we're outnumbered 4 to 1 ?" The soldier replied, "I got my four Sir."
Vote: has 64.51 % from 56 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military, war
Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
Vote: has 62.61 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
Q: Why do Soviet soldiers always miss? A: They have terrible Marxmanship.
Vote: has 62.22 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: ethnic, management, war
How does an octopus go to war? Well-armed.
Vote: has 60.15 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, war
Obama and his generals in the Pentagon discussed, and they could not agree on, what is the best time for the assault on Russia. Finally, they decide to ask the French: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The French answered: "We do not know, but certainly not in the winter, it would go wrong for sure." Therefore, it would probably be better to ask the Germans: "When is it best to invade Russia?" The Germans answer: "We do not know, but it certainly would not be in the summer. We have tried, already..." What to do? Someone proposes to ask China that is progressive and always comes up with a new idea. So they asked the Chinese, "When is the best time to invade Russia?" The Chinese replies: "Right now!" Russia began to build "The Strength of Siberia" pipeline, "Turkish stream", The Spaceport "Vostochny", The Bridge to the Crimea, and in the near future they will modernize the BAM, they are building new sports complexes for the World Cup in football and athletics, they are planning oil extraction in the Arctic... Right now they do need a lot of POW as work force.
Vote: has 59.80 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: ethnic, political, war, winter, work
Why were so many niggers killed in the Vietnam war? Because when the sergeant said to "get down", they all got up and started dancing.
Vote: has 59.23 % from 585 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, war
In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
Vote: has 58.58 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, war
Q: Hey, what's the jew doing in the ashtray? A: Family research.
Vote: has 57.35 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death, family, jewish, war