Chuck Norris can create tornados by running around in circles.
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There was a tornado in my area the other day.
The sky was so black; it took my bike.
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Q: How are women and tornadoes alike?
A: They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they go.
Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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It is so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.
Q: Did you hear the joke about an Earthquake and Japanese nuclear reactor?
A: Not cool.
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Jill: "How did you find the weather on your vacation?"
Bill: "I just went outside and there it was!"
Q: Why did Frosty the Snowman pull down his pants?
A: He heard the snow blower coming.
There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days.
It's called Monday.
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