I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like.
How do you do that?
I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's raining!
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Jill: "How did you find the weather on your vacation?"
Bill: "I just went outside and there it was!"
Chuck Norris doesn't sweat.
He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
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Q: What 80's rock band is banned from New Orleans and why?
A: The Scorpions. Every time they're in town, they rock you like a hurricane.
Q: How are women and a hurricane alike?
A: When they arrive they're both wet and wild, when they leave, they take your house and your car.
Q: How did the hail stone describe its life?
A: It really has a lot of ups and downs.
Two blondes lock their keys in the car. One of the blondes tries to break into the car while the the other one watches.
Finally the first blonde says "Darn, I can't get in the car!"
The other blond replies, "keep trying, it looks like it is going to rain and the top is down".
There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days.
It's called Monday.
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Q: Did you hear the joke about an Earthquake and Japanese nuclear reactor?
A: Not cool.
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The Sun is shining, what a beautiful day!
It would be a pity not to sit this day in a pub by the window though.