Q: Why do women have 2% more brains then a cow? A: So, when you pull their tits they won't shit on the floor.
This woman walks into a bar, and she has the hairiest armpits in the history of armpits. She sits down, raises her arm, and says, "Bartender, I would like a drink." There's an old drunk sitting next to her. Slurring, he says, "Barkeep, I would like to buy the ballerina a drink." She accepts, drinks it, raises her arm again to get the bartender's attention, and orders another. The old man says, "Barkeep, you just keep giving the ballerina anything she wants." Finally, the bartender goes over to the drunk and says, "Sir, that's nice of you, but how do you know she's a ballerina?" The old man answers, "Son, you don't get to be my age without learning that only ballerinas can lift their legs that high."
Q: How do you be pro in clash royale? A: Use rocket and rage spell ladies.
After his divorce Mr. Jones realized that poker isn't the only game that starts with holding hands and ends with a staggering financial loss.
Question: What’s the difference between your paycheck and your penis? Answer: You don’t have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.
I like my women the same as I like my whiskey ... 20 years old and mixed up with coke !
Q: What do you call that useless piece of skin around a vagina? A: A woman.
A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman. She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got news for you. You're going straight to hell!" The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts, "Man, I'm on the wrong bus!"
I don't have a girlfriend, I just know a girl who would get really mad if she heard me say that.
Q: How did the medical community come up with the term "PMS"? A: "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.