A man came up with a new invention, a vibrating tampon. That way a woman can be at her best when she is at her worst.
Q: Why don't women wear watches? A: There's a clock on the stove!
The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.
What do you call a black woman thats had 5 or more abortions? Crime fighter.
A mother was teaching her three year old daughter The Lord’s Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride, as she carefully said each word right up to the end… "And lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."
How can you tell she's a macho women? She rolls her own tampons.
At a Whitehouse party for past presidents. Michelle Obama caught Barron Trump making faces at Sasha. Michelle walked over to reprimand the child and said, "Barron, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Baron looked up and replied, "Well, Ms. Obama, you can't say you weren't warned."
Q: What do you call a blonde chick standing on her head? A: A brunette.
There was a crooked woman, who ran a crooked mile. She found a crooked Weiner, who always made her smile. She belongs in prison, for she is just a crook. And if you don't believe me, you can read it in her book.
Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.