Q: What dinosaur would Harry Potter be?
A: The Dinosorcerer
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Ewoks were just Homeless Care Bears on drugs.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear seatbelts.
Seatbelts wear Chuck Norris.
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Yo mama so damn short, she uses salt shaker as a toilet.
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Q: Wanna hear a joke?
A: Women's Rights.
The wrecking ball in the Miley Cyrus video isn't a wrecking ball it's one of Chuck Norris testicles.
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Why is it so hot in a stadium after a football game?
Because all the fans have left.
Q: Did you hear about the couple that "96ed?"
A: After they "69ed" they rolled over and sh*t in each other's hair.
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The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
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