Mess with Chuck Norris, you get roundhouse kicked.
What do you call an easy-going rabbit? Hoppy-go-lucky.
Yo momma’s so stupid, she died before the police arrived because she couldn’t find the ‘11’ button in ‘9-1-1’.
Why did the gray whale go on a diet? Because he wasn't a Fin whale.
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper and began reading. After a few minutes the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked, "Say, Father, what causes arthritis?" "Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man." "Wow," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper. The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized. "I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?" "I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
How has Jesse Jackson lost the vote of most niggers? He promised to create jobs for them if elected.
What do you do if you see your TV floating? Say " DROP IT NIGGA". What do you do if you see you refridgerator floating? Run because that is one hell of a big black guy!