A man goes into a psychiatric hospital to visit one of his buddies.
As he is walking out he notices a guy pretending to be swinging a hockey stick.
Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'm Wayne Gretzky, and I'm practicing my shot."
Satisfied with the answer the visitor moves on down the hall.
He notices another guy pretending to be playing golf.
Curious, he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'm Tiger woods and I'm practicing my golf."
Satisfied with this response the visitor again moves on down the hall.
He then sees another guy sitting in a chair in the nude with a jar of peanuts beside him.
This guy takes a peanut, places it on his dick, waits a minute, then flicks into his mouth.
Again, curious he asks: "What are you doing?"
The guy replies: "I'M FUCKING NUTS!"
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Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
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What did the cow wear to the football game?
A Jersey.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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Chuck Norris just checked out from 501... In 8 darts.
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What's better than 10 dead babies in 1 bag?
1 dead baby in 10 bags.
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Did you hear about Ku Klux Kineivals latest stunt?
He is going to try to jump 50 niggers with a steam roller.
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Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?
A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!
Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
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The president of the USA lives in the White House.
Chuck Norris lives in the Roundhouse.
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