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Q: What do you call a 900-pound woman with a yeast infection? A: A whopper with cheese.
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An engineer, a manager and a programmer are driving down a steep mountain road. The brakes fail and the car careens down the road until it hits a tree. They all get out and discuss how to fix the car. The manager says, ‘To fix this problem we need to organise a committee and develop a mission statement.’ The engineer says, ‘That would take too long. I have my penknife here. I’ll take apart the brake system, isolate the problem, and correct it.’ The programmer says, ‘No, I think we should push the car back up the road and see if it happens again.’
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Your mom's so fat she sat on Big Lots and it turned into Lowes!!!
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What is so special about the retirement age? "It is the time when one acquires sufficient experience to lose one's job."
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
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What do you get when you have sex with a pregnant woman? A baby with a black eye!
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More jokes about: baby, black humor, sex, women
Yo momma so fat and stupid, her waist size is larger than her IQ!
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Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.
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Why can’t gypsies have babies? Because their husbands have crystal balls.
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Teacher: "In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?" Pupil: "Holding up the telegraph lines!"
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