Best jokes ever

A man orders a pint of beer, notices it tastes sour and complains to the barman. ‘What are you moaning about?’ says the barman. ‘You’ve only got a pint of that rubbish, I’ve got three barrels full.’
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Why did the mobster put his money in the freezer? He liked cold hard cash!
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Q: What do you call a chilly dog sitting on bunny? A: A Cold dog on a bun.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers? New Jersey got to pick first.
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What did the blonde say to her doctor when he told her she was pregnant? "Is it mine?"
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What’s six inches long, two inches wide and drives women wild? A fifty-dollar bill.
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What does a blonde use for protection during sex? A bus shelter.
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Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend? A: He wiped.
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They say about money that you can’t take it with you. I can’t even afford to go.
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Two elderly gin-soaked colonels are sitting at the bar of their club. ‘Lend me a tenner for a month, old boy,’ says one. ‘What does a month-old boy want a tenner for?’ asks the other.
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More jokes about: money