Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.
When you come to a road that says "ONE WAY", that mean Chuck Norris is the other way.
The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway. But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
Chuck Norris does not fart, nothing escapes Chuck Norris.
Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.