Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses?
He was a rough rider!
A wife to her husband as they watch their young son playing:
"He's such a sensitive child.
Let's wait until he's older before we tell him you're an accountant."
Bruce lee does not drink water, he drinks WATAAAA.
The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
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What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties?
"Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
That bull you sold me is a lazy good-for-nothing.
I told you he was a bum steer.
What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes?
A dumb bunny.
If you say "alright" in the mirror 3 times Matthew McConaughey will appear and hand you a joint.
Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo.
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