When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
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Chuck Norris can Do Mental Math on Paper.
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For Chuck Norris, there is no such thing as gambling.
He already knows the outcome.
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The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
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A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
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Q: How did Albert Einstein celebrate Thanksgiving?
A: He was very thinkful.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.'
The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'.
Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, ''But they are twins.
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.''
What's red and dances all around?
A baby on a barbecue
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What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus with a yeast infection?
An itchy, twitchy twat!
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