Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass
Q: What's the difference between an epyleptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diahrrea? A: One shucks between fits.
How do you blindfold a Chinese person? Put floss over their eyes.
How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? As many as it takes to climb on top of them in order to reach the socket.
If you throw a kitten out of a moving car, would it be considered kitty litter?
She has her husband eating out of the palm of her hand – it saves on the washing-up.
What's pink and chunky? A baby with leprosy.
The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!" Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"
Husband: I want to go somewhere on holiday this year I've never been before. Wife: Well, how about the kitchen?
The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow. I rang her up, I said ''Did you get my drift?''.