Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Of course you would.
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Chuck Norris got a flame and froze it.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job".
That is the story of the universe.
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Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
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The square root of Chuck Norris is pain.
Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole bucket of sleepng pills and it managed to make him yawn.
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Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
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When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor.
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