In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
Chuck starts the new year by roundhouse kicking the old one.
Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
Chuck Norris doesn't solve math - math solves Chuck Norris.
One morning Lil Johnny walks into the classroom with no shirt on. Teacher looks at him and asks where he has been.Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. The next day Johnny walks in with no pants on. Teacher looks at him and asks where have you been. Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. The next day Johnny comes in completly naked. The teacher gasps and asks Johnny again where hes been. Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. Johnny looks over his shoulder and sighs her she comes now.
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera? Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
Why can’t elephants go on the beach? Because they can’t keep there trunks up.
Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? Sure. Here you are. Thanks - but half the pages are missing. What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?
Old doctors never die, they just lose their patience.
How many cop jokes are there? Just two, all the rest are true!