There was a guy and he went to the doctor and he showed the doctor his dick.
He asked why it was orange and the doctor replyed:
Have you been doing anything unusual?
And he said: No.
So the doctor ran so tests then he sent the guy home told him to come back in 2 weeks.
So he did and it was even oranger so once again the doctor asked:
Have you been doing anything at all unusual?
And the guy said:
Well about 2 weeks ago I was watching porno and eating a bag of crunchy cheetos.
A teenage boy overdosed on ten bottles of Viagra.
Not only is he lucky to be alive, he’s lucky not to have taken his eye out.
My sex life isn’t dead, but the buzzards are circling.
Q: Do you know how Chinese people name their children?
A: They throw some pans and based on the noises they make like "ting tang," "Dung dung", "Ting tang dung"
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How are tigers like sergeants in the army?
They both wear stripes.
If you use Chuck Norris in a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, you automatically win.
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Chuck Norris has an iPhone with whole apple.
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Which is the only day you you are safe in a cannibal village?
Sitter days (when they eat the baby-sitter instead)!
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Santa Clause doesn't watch you sleep but Chuck Norris does.
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Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
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