Best jokes ever

The Internet: where men are men, women are men, and children are the FBI...
Vote:
has 79.84 % from 239 votes. More jokes about: internet, IT
In the Sex Ed class the teacher says, "All right, class, I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions as you can think of for making sex." The next day she says to Little Johnny in the back, "Well, John, how many positions did you come up with?" Johnny says, "Seventy-three." The teacher says, "Oh, my goodness...uh...very good, John, very good..." She calls on Becky in the front and says, "All right, Becky, how about you?" Becky says, "Gee, teacher, I only came up with one...where the guy just lays on top of the girl." Johnny yells, "Seventy-four."
Vote:
has 79.82 % from 648 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, sex, teacher
What has two wings and a halo? A Chinese telephone. Wing, Wing, Halo
Vote:
has 79.82 % from 332 votes. More jokes about: phone, racist
Q: Did you hear about the new movie "Constipation?" A: It hasn't come out yet.
Vote:
has 79.80 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
After working together for a while, Frank and Jane's office romance blossomed and they really developed the hots for each other. One day,they seize the opportunity to sneak into a supply closet to consummate their lust. Frank finds Jane very tight and difficult to enter, but finally succeeds. When they are finished, Frank says to her, "If I had known you were a virgin, I would have taken more time!" To which Jane replies, "If I'd known you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose!"
Vote:
has 79.80 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Sandy and John were an extremely liberal, though not especially bright, white couple. Wanting to begin a family, they decided they wanted to have a black baby, and set to work. Nine months later, the fruits of their labor was born: a lovely white girl. Pleased but disappointed, John decided to ask a black man at work why they hadn't parented a black baby. Realizing that John was somewhat sluggish, the fellow took him aside and asked, "Is your d*ck at least a foot long?" John had to admit that it was not. "And is it at least four inches wide?" Once more John replied in the negative. "Well, man, there's your problem!" the guy slapped him on the back. "You let in too much light!"
Vote:
has 79.80 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: dirty
In a murder trial, the defense attorney was cross-examining the coroner: "Before you signed the death certificate, did you take the pulse, listen to the heart or check for breathing?" "No." "So, when you signed the death certificate, you weren't sure the man was dead, were you?" "Well, the man's brain was in a jar on my desk, but I suppose he could have still been practicing law for a living."
Vote:
has 79.80 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: death, lawyer
Yo mama so fat it took nationwide 3 years to get on her side.
Vote:
has 79.80 % from 1150 votes. More jokes about: fat, time, Yo mama
Your mama is so ugly, that she made a blind kid cry.
Vote:
has 79.77 % from 2481 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, Yo mama
After 5 hours sitting in the bar, a man was in no shape to drive, wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 am?", said the officer. "I'm going to a lecture.", the man said. And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?", the cop asked. "My wife!!!" said the man.
Vote:
has 79.77 % from 108 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, car, cop, wife
<<<138139140141
More jokes →
Page 138 of 1429.