Best jokes ever

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Vote: has 77.70 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, weather
Home is where the wifi connects automatically.
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More jokes about: IT
Yo mamma is so fat, her husband has to stand up in bed each morning to see if it's daylight.
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More jokes about: fat, husband, insulting, Yo mama
Q: What do the Starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common? A: They both circle Uranus searching for Klingons.
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More jokes about: disgusting
A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. "Looking for a man with three qualifications: won’t beat me up, won’t run away from me, and is great in bed." Two days later her doorbell rings. "Hi, I’m Tim. I have no arms so I won’t beat you, and no legs so I won't run away." "What makes you think you are great in bed?" the woman retorts. Tim replies, "I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?"
Vote: has 77.68 % from 532 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A blonde was sick and tired of people making fun of her for being a blonde, so she decided to hang herself. A couple minutes later two men walk by and see her hanging by her wrists. "What are you doing." they ask her. So she replies "Hanging myself." The men are confused and asked "If you are hanging youself, you put the rope around your neck." The blond says "Duh....I tried that, I couldn't breath."
Vote: has 77.67 % from 195 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, death, stupid
16 and Pregnant. 15 and Fucking. 14 and Sucking. 13 and Licking. 12 and Fingering. 11 and Touching. 9 and Kissing. 8 and Wondering. Welcome To Our Fucked Up Generation...
Vote: has 77.66 % from 1641 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, sex
Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. So if you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
Vote: has 77.64 % from 144 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected. He knows the unexpected.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Life Lemons Saying: White Guy: When Life gives you lemons enjoy them with friends. Black Guy: When Life gives you lemons sell them, buy a gun, point it at life and say "More lemons mother Fucker".
Vote: has 77.64 % from 284 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, racist