Best jokes ever

Sex is like air – it’s not important until you’re not getting any.
Vote: has 76.60 % from 406 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
A doctor complains to his colleagues about the sanitary problems at a latex glove factory in Mexico. "Workers stick their hands in melted latex and then dip their hands in a vat of cooling water to solidify the latex. The glove is then thrown in a finished products box." His colleagues are disgusted by the lack of care taken in keeping the gloves sanitary. "That's not all," says the doctor. "You don't even want to know how they make their condoms!"
Vote: has 76.59 % from 67 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
There was a guy in a bar one night that got drunk, I mean really, really, really drunk. When the bar closed, he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door, he saw a nun walking on the sidewalk. So he stumbled over to the nun and punched her in the face. Well, the nun was totally surprised, but before she could do or say anything, he punched her again. This time she fell down and he stumbled over to her and kicked her in the butt. Then he picked her up and threw her into a wall. By this time the nun was pretty weak and couldn't move very much. So then he leaned over her, put his face right next to hers and said; "Not very f..kin' strong tonight, are you Batman?"
Vote: has 76.59 % from 67 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, celebrity, drunk
Q: What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? A: Every morning you'll rise and shine!
Vote: has 76.59 % from 557 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids
There were three guys in a bar. Two are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives. The third remains silent. After a while, one of the first two turned to the third and says, "Well... what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?" "Well, on our honeymoon, I made damn sure my wife came to me on her hands and knees," he bragged and took another sip of beer. His friends were amazed! "What happened then?" they asked, almost in unison." "Well, then she said, "Get the hell out from under that bed and fight like a man!" he admitted.
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men
In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: airplane, Chuck Norris, technology, time
The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music
Patient: Doc I keep on forgetting things. Doctor: Since when did you have these problems? Patient: What problems?
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
Vote: has 76.54 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Teacher: “Johnny, what is the outside of a tree called?” Johnny: “I don’t know.” Teacher: “Bark, Johnny, bark.” Johnny: “Bow, wow, wow!”
Vote: has 76.54 % from 190 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school