Yo momma is so fat when she walked by the TV i missed 3 episodes!
I don't know whats happening in this country.
You've got school children dressing like whores and whores dressing like school children.
Its a nightmare... you just don't know whether to carry sweets or money!
Yo' Mama's so fat, her scale reads "Game Over."
Yo mamma is so fat, her husband has to stand up in bed each morning to see if it's daylight.
There are three blonds that went to the store.
After they get done in the store one of the blondes realizes that she locked her keys in her car.
The first blond tried using a screwdriver to unlock the door.
The second blond tried using a hanger.
The third blond tried using pen.
While they are trying to unlock the door the second blond says "We better hurry up guys its about to rain and the tops down!"
Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
1. Money cannot buy happiness, but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemies but remember their name.
3. Help someone when they are in trouble and they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.
5. Alcohol does not solve any problems, but then neither does milk!
Someone once broke into Chuck Norris' house and instead of stealing anything they gave Chuck Norris everything they owned.
Helium walks into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
Yo Momma so fat, she rolled out of bed and everybody thought there was an earthquake.