Allstate gets insurance from Chuck Norris, because even Allstate needs to be in good hands.
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A Mexican and a black person jump off a bridge, who wins?
Society.
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The only time the word incorrectly isn't spelled incorrectly is when it's spelled incorrectly.
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What do you do if an epileptic falls in your pool?
Throw in your laundry.
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Yo mama so old that when she went to the museum, people thought she was part of an exhibit.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.
Boss comes up to an employee:
"Yesterday you did a great job - in one day you managed to do as much work, as you did in previous month!"
"Thanks boss, that's because Facebook was shut down for the whole day."
One night my mother in law came to our home.
In the middle of the night suddenly I was awakened by a horrible sound from WC.
She farted.
I was so angry that shouted and said: "Your food is under your feet and your weapons are complete get out and go to fight with ISIS!"
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Black humour is like a pair of legs.
Not everyone has it.
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