When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
Chuck Norris CAN get blood from a stone.
Climate change is just Chuck Norris playing with the thermostat.
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
Lehman Brothers owed Chuck Norris a fiver. When he asked for payback, well, you know the rest.
Extra Terrestrials often visit Earth from other galaxies - they're here to see if Chuck Norris really exists.
Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.