When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Chuck Norris is the greatest thing, period, despite his invention of sliced bread.
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Chuck Norris can see ultra-violet light.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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Salmon swim upstream because Chuck Norris is downstream.
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Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row.
The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.
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A train saw Chuck Norris on the track and turned down a dirt road.
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Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room.
The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
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