Best jokes ever

A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class, was squirming around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the principal’s office; he was to phone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did, and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your Mom," she screamed. "I did," he said, "and she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she’d come and pick me up from school."
Vote:
has 71.88 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: school
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
Vote:
has 71.87 % from 228 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Little Johnny comes home one day and says, "Mom! Little Mark next door has a penis like a peanut!" "What do you mean, Johnny? Is it shaped like a peanut?" "No," says Johnny. "It's salty."
Vote:
has 71.87 % from 228 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, gay, little Johnny
Chuck Norris built the hospital in which he was born.
Vote:
has 71.87 % from 181 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Laughing is always good except when you have diarrhea.
Vote:
has 71.86 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, health
Yo mamma is like the sun, stare at her and you'll go blind.
Vote:
has 71.86 % from 702 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
What do you call an operation on a rabbit? A hare-cut.
Vote:
has 71.85 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: When does a person decide to become an accountant? A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.
Vote:
has 71.85 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: accountant, life
An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. Little Boy says " He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!" Officer says "Yes." Little Boy asks "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture.
Vote:
has 71.85 % from 173 votes. More jokes about: cop, little Johnny
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first orders a beer, the second orders half a beer, the third orders a quarter of a beer, and so on. After the seventh order, the bartender pours two beers and says, "You fellas ought to know your limits."
Vote:
has 71.83 % from 109 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, food, math
<<<317318319320
More jokes →
Page 317 of 1427.