Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive? A: Her ankles.
Q: What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers? A: If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit!
Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time, and she asked, “My name begins with the letter ‘M’ and I pick up things. What am I?” A little boy on the front row proudly said, “You’re a mother!”
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.
A Microsoft support technician goes to a firing range. He shoots ten bullets at the target 50m away. The supervisors check the target and see that there’s not even a single hit. They shout to him that he missed completely. The technician tells them to recheck, and gets the same answer. The technician then aims the gun at his finger and shoots, blasting it off. He shouts back, ‘It’s working fine here! The problem must be at your end!’
If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Men are like.....Horoscopes. They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.
Yo Momma is so fat… when she took her shirt off at the strip club,everyone thought she was Jabba The Hut from Star Wars.
An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. Little Boy says " He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!" Officer says "Yes." Little Boy asks "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture.
Q: Did you hear that it is twice as easy to train Iraqi fighter pilots? A: You only have to teach them to take off.