Best jokes ever

How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? Yes.
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has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: IT, light bulb, programmer
I was having a shit in the train toilet today, when some bloke knocked on the door. He said, "Can I see your ticket please?" "Not right now" I shouted, "I'm having a shit!" He said, "I don't believe you, can you pass it under the door?" "No problem," I said, sliding it under. "The yellow bits are sweetcorn."
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has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
A little boy was pushing a heavy cart uphill with a lot of effort. The work was very tiring, so someone walking nearby felt pity and helped the little boy push the heavy cart until the end of the hill. He stopped indignant there and told to the child: "You should say to your boss that it is a shame to make a kid such hard work to do." "I told them, sir." "Well, what did they reply?" "Pull kid and some sucker will be there to help you."
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has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: god, kids, work
How can you help a starving cannibal? Give him a helping hand.
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has 70.39 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food
An aging man lived alone in Ireland. His only son was in Long Kesh Prison and he didn't know anyone who would spade up his potato garden. The old man wrote to his son about it and received this reply. "For Heavens SAKES, don't dig up that garden, that's where I buried the GUNS! At 4 A.M. the next morning a dozen British soldiers showed up and dug up the entire garden, but didn't find any guns. Confused the man wrote to his son telling him what happened and asking him what to do next. His son's reply was: "Just plant your potatoes."
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has 70.38 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: age, cop, food, life, prison
"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"
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has 70.36 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: insulting, single, ugly
She said "Gym or me". Sometimes I miss her.
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has 70.36 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: gym, women
A scientist tells a pharmacist, "Give me some prepared tablets of acetylsalicylic acid." "Do you mean aspirin?" asks the pharmacist. The scientist slaps his forehead. "That's it!" he says. "I can never remember the name."
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has 70.36 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, geek, medical, memory, science
If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
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has 70.36 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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has 70.35 % from 130 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music
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