Q: What do you call a violent minority?
A: A thug.
Q: What do you call a violent white guy?
A: Officer.
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A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
It's a proven fact that you will go blind faster staring at a picture of Chuck Norris than you would staring at the sun.
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A teacher goes around her class asking each of the kids what do they need at home?
1st kid says, "A computer."
Teacher replies "That'd be very useful"
2nd kid says "A new lawn mower."
Teacher replies with a similar response...
Little Johnny pops up and says, "At my house we don"t need anything."
The teacher asks him to think again carefully as everybody needs something...
Little Johnny replies, "Nope, i'm sure of it. Whenever my sister started going out with a NIGGER, i remember my dad saying, "Well, thats the last f*cking thing we need."
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Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8?
Student: Miss horizontally or vertically?
Teacher: What do mean?
Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.
Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool.
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King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
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Like changing coins - I always desired to change my 60 old years wife to three 20 years girls!
A girl started noticing a guy who stands in front of her home everyday in the evening.
She noticed the guy always comes mostly in the evenings and weekends.
The guy never tried to talk to her nor showed any gesture, he just moves here and there by looking into his mobile phone and occasionally stealing a stare at her.
It went on like that for a year and the girl understood the guy was in love with her but was too shy to express his feelings.
So, she told her parents.
They too saw him and liked him.
They discussed with her grandparents about a likely marriage.
But wanted her to make the first move.
The next day, she went to him and said, Hi. I'm Jada.
He said, Hi. I'm Smith.
Hearing this, the girl was very happy as the names were matching like Will Smith and Jada Pinkett.
The girl went on and said, I really appreciate your patience and decency.
You have been standing in front of my home everyday for about a year now.
So, I understand that you are in love with me but too shy to say it.
I think i really like you too and would love it if we get married.
The guy smiled and said, Forgive me sister! Actually your home's WIFI doesn't have a password. So, i come here every evening after work to use free wi-fi to chat with my girlfriend.
Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem?
A: Father's Day.
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