Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows.
Why are men like bank accounts? Without a lot of money, they don't generate much interest!
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."
2 > 1... unless that 1 is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once had a heart attack; his heart lost.
The Question Mark was invented after scientists attempted to measure the speed of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the word 'Facial' is used.
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it.
Why don't black people pay rent? Because jail is free.
Q: A smart blond, Santa and a pregnant woman are on an elevator. A twenty-dollar bill lies on the ground. Who picks it up? A: The pregnant woman... the other two aren't real!