It's a proven fact that you will go blind faster staring at a picture of Chuck Norris than you would staring at the sun.
Chuck Norris can divide prime numbers into whole numbers.
A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
Chuck Norris can set water on fire. He can also set fire on water.
When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad. It says he's Chuck Norris.
Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.
Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series. We know it as Forged in the fire.