Best jokes ever

A woman, after giving birth to six babies, upon seeing her husband gets up off the hospital bed, walks over to him shouting "I told you not to go doggy style!"
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: baby, dirty, life, marriage, sex
Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
The government shutdown has officially lasted longer than any of Taylor Swift's relationships.
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has 70.45 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: life, political, relationship
Yo' Mama is so fat, a cop saw her standing alone and told her to break it up.
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has 70.43 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: cop, fat, Yo mama
Two cannibals are enjoying a Thanksgiving dinner and a light conversation about all things family. "I just can't stand my mother-in-law," sighs one. "That's quite understandable," nods the other one, "why don't you just have the potatoes with the gravy?"
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has 70.43 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, food, mother in law, Thanksgiving
The teacher brings a statue of Venus into class and asks, “What do you like best about it, class? Let’s start with you, Robert.” Robert: “The artwork.” Teacher: “Very good. And you, Peter?” Peter: “Her tits!” Teacher: “Peter, get out! Go stand in the hall! And you, Johnny?” Johnny: “I’m leaving, teacher, I’m leaving…”
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has 70.43 % from 88 votes. More jokes about: school
Angry geek dad shouted to kid, "End of discussion; Semicolon;"
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: IT
An old lady has asked her priest: "please, tell me, what do you think, will I go after my death to Heaven or to Hell?" Because the priest has heard this question already at least million times before, so he has decided to tell the old lady the last and final answer, so he has asked her: "and do you still have your own teeth?" The old lady has said: "no, I have only a dental plate." The priest has told her: "now, you can see, now, you can see, you will go surely to Heaven because in Hell you can hear only crying and gnashing of the teeth."
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: heaven, old people, priest
On the way home from a hunt, a hunter stops by the grocery store. "Give me a couple of steaks," he says. "We're out of steaks but we have hot dogs and chicken," says the butcher. "Hotdogs and chicken?!" yells the hunter. "How can I tell my wife I bagged a couple of hotdogs and chickens?"
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: communication, food, hunting, marriage, mean
Programmers: See one warning, fixes warning. Compiles... See two errors, fixes errors. Compiles... See 83 errors, pitches computer.
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, IT, technology, work
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