Best jokes ever

Q: What does the receptionist at the sperm clinic say when clients are leaving? A: “Thanks for coming!”
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has 70.42 % from 603 votes. More jokes about: sex
Jimmy was staring at a dog in the park whilst the dog was licking himself in inappropriate parts and said to his dad, "I wish I could do that." Jimmy's dad looked down at Jimmy and said, "Maybe if you ask the dog nicely, he might let you!"
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has 70.40 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A guy goes into a drug store to buy condoms. The girl behind the counter says, “What size?” He says, “I don’t know.” She hold up a finger and says, “That big?” He says, “Bigger.” She holds up three fingers and says, “That big?” He says, “Smaller?” She holds up two fingers and he says, “That’s it.” She puts the two fingers in her mouth and says, “Medium.”
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has 70.40 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: dirty, drug
A man has his car full of penguins. He drives past a policeman, but the policeman stops him. He says. "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You should take those penguins to the zoo!" The man does that. The next day in the same spot, the man still has the penguins. Once again he drives past the policeman. "Hey, I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo!" "I did," replies the man. "We had so much fun that were going to the beach today!"
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: When do accountants laugh out loud? A: When somebody asks for a raise.
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, work
Me driving by a Taco Bell. Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Two weeks later: Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Background Checks Required.
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: food, management, mean
The best time to start thinking about your retirement is before the boss does.
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: old people
An old man and his wife went to the doctor's office. The doctor asked the man for a blood, urine and feces sample. The man was slightly deaf and said, "What?" The doctor said, "I need a blood, urine and feces sample." The man still looked puzzled, so his wife leaned over and yelled into his ear, "Sheldon, the doctor needs a pair of your underwear."
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, wife
An FBI agent was interviewing a bank teller after the bank had been robbed 3 times by the same bandit: "Did you notice anything special about the man?" asks the agent. "Yes," replied the teller. "He was better dressed each time."
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop, money
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has 70.40 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: geek, IT, technology
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