Best jokes ever

[first day as a pilot] Control tower: What's your location? Me: I'm in the cockpit. Control tower: I mean where is the airplane? Me: Mainly behind me.
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has 67.51 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: communication, travel, work
Nothing beats a beautiful woman who can sing... except Chris Brown.
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: beauty, celebrity, music, women
A man buys a pet parrot and brings him home. But the parrot starts insulting him and gets really nasty, so the man picks up the parrot and tosses him into the freezer to teach him a lesson. He hears the bird squawking for a few minutes, but all of a sudden the parrot is quiet. The man opens the freezer door, the parrot walks out, looks up at him and says, "I apologize for offending you, and I humbly ask your forgiveness." The man says, "Well, thank you. I forgive you." The parrot then says, "If you don't mind my asking, what did the chicken do?"
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: animal, insulting, parrot
One day in the city a bus driver was making his usual stops. At the first stop a woman came to the front of the bus to get off. She turned to the bus driver and said, "I think I was just molested back there." The bus driver looked at her and said, "Not on my bus. You couldn't have been." So, he lets her off and drives on. He comes to the next stop and another woman comes to the front to get off. She, too, looks at the bus driver and says, "I think I was just molested back there." Now the bus driver thinks that something has to be wrong, to get two complaints like this in one day is just unheard of. He gets up out of his seat and goes to the back of the bus. To his surprise there is a bald guy crawling on the floor on his hands and knees. The bus driver says, "Sir, what are you doing?" The man looks at him and says, "I lost my toupee. I thought I found it twice, but I lost it again."
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, women
Why is making toast like an interracial couple having a baby? It's annoying when it comes out black.
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has 67.50 % from 233 votes. More jokes about: baby, black people, racist
Q: What is the most confusing day in Harlem? A: Father's Day.
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has 67.49 % from 476 votes. More jokes about: black people, Fathers day, kids, sex
Why do women close their eyes during sex? They can't stand to see a man have a good time.
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has 67.49 % from 286 votes. More jokes about: sex
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
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has 67.48 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: life
A doctor from the inner city was conversing with an old friend from med school at a cafe when he said, "Man, can I tell you something?" His friend nods. "Sure." "Okay, so the other day I had this one really hot, foreign patient, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since..." He goes on to tell his friend everything about her, from her long blond hair and ability to speak fluent French, to her shimmering blue eyes and soft skin. His friend seemed more disgusted with each passing moment. "Dude, that is not cool." The doctor, indignant, defended himself. "What's wrong with that? Lots of doctors are attracted to their patients." His friend simply shook his head and replied, "Maybe, but I guarantee you none of those doctors were pediatricians..."
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has 67.47 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, dirty, doctor, friendship
Q: A brunette, a blonde and a redhead are all in fifth grade. Who has the biggest tits? A: The blonde, because she's 18.
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has 67.47 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: age, blonde, ginger, school
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