Best jokes ever

This couple had been dating for about six months, but the guy had been afraid to make any s*xual advances because of his tiny organ. Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car. While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his p*nis. "No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
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has 67.39 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Three guys are at a restaurant, all with their girlfriends. The first guy, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the honey?...Honey." Now, the second guy, copying the first, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the sugar?...Sugar." So now, the third guy is under pressure. He has to come up with something good. After, a minute of thinking he says to his girlfriend, "Pass me the pork...pig."
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: What did the valentines day card say to the stamp? A: Stick with me and you'll go places.
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: communication, travel, Valentines day
Little boy says to his father: "Daddy, I heard on the news that cigarettes have become much more expensive. Does it mean that you're going to smoke less from now on?" And father replies: "No, son. I will smoke as much as a have. But, you'll be eating less!"
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dad, food, kids, mean, money
A girlfriend said to me during sex that I should be a little more graceful, so I went to ballet classes!
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: communication, relationship, sex
Once there was a blonde who really needed some money. She saw an ad in the newspaper for a job at an Elmo factory. She went down and applied, but the manager told her that she wouldn't want the job because it was so boring. The blonde begged him and told him she would do anything because she needed the money really bad. After long consideration the manager hired her. After a few hours the manager looked at the video-monitor showing the factory floor and saw that the conveyer belt was backed up. The manager went downstairs to find out what the problem was. When he arived there the blonde was sewing two marbles into the crotch of every Elmo. The manager said, "I said to give each Elmo two test tickles; not two testicles!"
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: blonde
There was a horny young lady named Lil, Who fucked dynamite sticks for a thrill. They found her vagina In North Carolina And bits of her tits in Brazil!
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Yo mama so fat I thought of her in my head and I broke my neck.
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
I like your style I like your class but most of all i like your ass.
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has 67.33 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, poems
I think my sons gay...I took off the seat of his bike, and he didn't notice.
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has 67.33 % from 278 votes. More jokes about: gay, kids
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