Best jokes ever

Little Johnny was in church, getting restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on. Not able to take it anymore, he leaned over to his father and whispered, "Hey, Dad, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"
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has 67.20 % from 191 votes. More jokes about: church, dad, little Johnny, money, priest
How do you know if you've walked into the wrong Chinese bookstore? It'll be called "Wong Fook Hing Book Store".
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has 67.20 % from 191 votes. More jokes about: asian, racist
One attractive young businesswoman to another over lunch: "My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying."
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: business, life, math, time, women
"I want a divorce"! "But you made a vow in the church that we remain together till death do us part." "I guess you are right. Very well, go ahead and drink up the tea I made for you."
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: black humor, church, death, divorce, wedding
Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris
An old man and a young man work together in an office. The old man always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and the young man really loves peanuts. One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar. When the old man returns, the young man feels guilty and confesses to his crime. "Don't worry, son. I never eat the peanuts anyway," the old man replies. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's."
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: age, chocolate, disgusting, food, work
The sailor came home from a secret two year mission only to find his wife with a new born baby. Furious, he was determined to track down the father to extract revenge. "Was it my friend Sam", he demanded. "No !" his weeping wife replied. "Was it my friend Jim then?" he asked. "NO !!!" she said even more upset. "Well which one of my no good friends did this then?" he asked. "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?" she snapped.
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: military
A young boy caught sight of his mother changing one day, and asked her what that was that she had between her legs. "That is something you're never going to talk about again. And you shouldn't touch it either, because it has teeth." Many years went by, and the boy never touched any girl in between her legs, because he was very scared. One day, however, he met the love of his life and, in time, they got married. On their wedding night, his wife asked him to touch her there. "No," he said, "it's got teeth." "Silly goose!" she said. She spread her legs wide for him to see. "See? No teeth!" "Well, I'm not surprised," the man said. "Not with gums like that."
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Black holes are where God divided by zero.
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has 67.19 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: geek, god, math, science
Q: Whats the diffrence between a park bench and a black guy? A: The park bench can support a family.
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has 67.18 % from 436 votes. More jokes about: black people, family, racist
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