Q: What do you call a white guy with 5 black friends? A: Coach!
Yo mama's so dumb that when she saw the "Under 17 not admitted" sign at a movie theatre, she went home and got 16 friends.
I wake up everyday planning to be productive and then voice in my head says: "Haha nice one!" and we laugh and laugh and take a nap.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire? Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.
The truth hurts dosen't it, Chuck Norris' truth kills.
Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.
Yo mama so old she had a wedding picture with George Washington.
Why does a chicken lay eggs? Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
Q: What do you call a cow during an earthquake? A: A milk shake.