Best jokes ever

Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
Vote: has 69.49 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
I use camouflage condoms so they cant see me coming.
Vote: has 69.49 % from 66 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
A man and a woman meet in an elevator. "Where are you heading today?" the man asks. "I'm going down to give blood." "How much do you get paid for giving blood?" "About $20." "Wow," says the man, "I'm going up to donate sperm, and the sperm bank pays $100." The woman angrily gets off the elevator. The next day, the man and woman meet in the elevator again. "Fancy meeting you again. Where you off to today?" "Sperm bank," she says with her mouth full.
Vote: has 69.46 % from 126 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: medical, men, money, sex, women
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church? A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
Vote: has 69.45 % from 100 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: church, disgusting, gay
One step forward, 12 floors down.
Vote: has 69.44 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Why are there no mexicans on star trek? They don't work in the future either.
Vote: has 69.44 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist
Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine. We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
Vote: has 69.44 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sex
So a little kid and a child molester start walking into a forest. They keep walking for what seems like hours, and it gets darker and darker and darker, and the forest gets deeper and deeper and deeper. The kid turns to the child molester and he says "Gee mister, it sure is scary out here!" The child molester says "How do you think I feel, kid? I'm gonna have to walk out of this forest by myself!"
Vote: has 69.44 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
Two statisticians go bird hunting. The first one fires at the bird but overshoots by 5 feet. The second one fires and undershoots the bird by 5 feet. They both give each other a high-five and say "Got it!"
Vote: has 69.44 % from 202 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
What's the difference between a white naked woman and a black naked woman? The white girl is seen in Playboy and the black chick is seen on National Geographic.
Vote: has 69.42 % from 273 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, geography, racist, women