Best jokes ever

Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: Getting her out of the wheelchair.
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has 66.01 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food, health
Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
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has 66.01 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, time
Q: What do you do when your computer gets wet? A: Put it in a bowl of rice, an Asian will show up and they will fix it.
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has 66.00 % from 436 votes. More jokes about: asian, computer, racist
Q: What's faster then a black guy running down the street with your TV? A: His brother behind him with the VCR.
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has 65.95 % from 488 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
What do you call a nigger with no arms, and no legs? Trustworthy.
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has 65.94 % from 190 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the Pearly Gates, petted her on the head and said, "You have been a good cat for these 40 years. Anything that you want is yours for the asking." The cat thought for a minute and replied, "All my life I have lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on." God said, "Say no more." Instantly the cat had a huge, fluffy pillow. A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident, and they all went to heaven together. God met them at the gates of Heaven with the same offer He made to the cat. The mice said, "Well, all our lives we've had to run from dogs, cats and even people with brooms. If we could just have some little roller skates, we'd never have to run again." God said, "It is done!" All the mice had beautiful little roller skates. About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow. God gently awakened the cat and asked, "Is everything okay? How you been doing? Are you happy?" The cat replied, "Oh, I've never been so happy in my life! My pillow is so fluffy, and those little meals-on-wheels you've been sending over here are delicious!"
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has 65.94 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, god, heaven, life
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: "Well, I hope you like changing nappies/diapers". She replies: "Oh my god am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?" To which he responds: "No, you've got bowel cancer."
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has 65.94 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, health
Wife: "I have to tell you something. I'm pregnant." Husband: "Hi Pregnant, I'm Dad." Wife: "No, you are not."
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has 65.94 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: husband, marriage, men, wife
Q: Why did the cannibal tax auditor get disciplined? A: For buttering up her clients.
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has 65.94 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: black humor, morbid, tax
A bus full of housewives going on a picnic crashed with no survivors. Each husband cried for a week, but one husband continued for more than two weeks. When asked he replied miserably... "My wife missed the bus"
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has 65.92 % from 1194 votes. More jokes about: death, husband, marriage, wife
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