Best jokes ever

Me: "I'm so lonely." Person: "Hey!" Me: "Leave me alone."
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: relationship, single
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, coding, computer, IT
Now, that's gotta be a hell of a thing to go to jail for cable. You in there with mass murderers and everybody. "What you in here for?" "I killed six people. What you in here for?" "Comedy Central."
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: death, life, prison
A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is anything OK?"
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, old people
A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says "Sorry, you know the law, you've got to go back across the border right now." The Mexican man pleads with them, "No, noooo Senor, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!" The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself, I'm going to make it hard for him and says "Ok, I'll let you stay if you can use three english words in a sentence. The three words are 'green,' 'pink,' and 'yellow.'" The Mexican man thinks , then says, "Hmmm, okay. The phone, it went green, green, green. I pink it up and sez yellow?"
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has 65.19 % from 100 votes. More jokes about: racist
I'm not racist, my shadow is black.
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has 65.16 % from 531 votes. More jokes about: racist
Two hookers standing on a street corner started discussing business. One of the hookers said, "Gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "Sorry No, I just burped."
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has 65.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: sex
Sundials tell the time according to the position of Chuck Norris.
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has 65.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time
Q: What did Hitler get his granddaughter for her 5th birthday? A: An easy bake oven.
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has 65.16 % from 116 votes. More jokes about: birthday, black humor, Hitler, morbid
One woman to another at a singles bar: “I’m not as optimistic about relationships as I used to be. These days, when I meet a man, I ask myself, 'Is this the guy I want my children to spend every other weekend with?'”
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has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, relationship
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