An ancient Chinese prophecy states that a man will be created to protect the lands from all evil. Chuck Norris killed that man.
Chuck Norris invented the printing press by putting two pieces of blank paper together.
Q: What is worst than raining black cats and bloodhounds? A: Hailing taxi cabs!
Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
Chuck gives the sun the chills.
Chuck Norris knows what's eating Gilbert Grape.
Anybody can outdo the impossible, but nobody can outdo Chuck Norris.
Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.