Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A man goes to a bar says, "Barman drinks on me to you the owner and everybody else in here!" Comes the end of the night the man say...sorry man it seems i forgot my wallet. The barman kicks him in the guts and throws him out. The next day the man comes again, "Barman drinks on me to you the owner and everybody else in here!" Comes the end of the night the man say...sorry man i don't have any money on me. The barman hits him in the face with bar stool brakes his leg and throws him out. The following day the man comes to the bar again, "Barman drinks on me for the owner and everybody else in here!" Barman says, "What am not getting a free drink tonight?" "Sorry man but you get violent when you drink."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, money
An IRS agent is lying on his psychiatrist's couch bemoaning the fact that everyone in the world hates him. "Nonsense", says his doctor. "Everyone in the world doesn't hate you. Everyone in the United States, perhaps, but certainly not everyone in the world."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: accountant, doctor, geography, mean
What dog can jump higher than a building? Anydog, buildings can't jump!
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal
One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information" "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted. "It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: school, science, student
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer. "I'm going to a lecture." the man said. "And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife." said the man.
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, car, cop, time, wife
A blonde and a brunette were opening their paychecks when the blonde asked the brunette what she was going to buy. The brunette replied, "I think I'll buy a new set of plates because mine are chipped. What are you going to buy?" The blonde said, "I think I'm gonna buy a new butt, because my old one has an enormous crack in it."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: blonde
In Africa, in a hospital, a black man entered armed – he had a knife on him – stick in his back!
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has 64.34 % from 1018 votes. More jokes about: black people, hospital
What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
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has 64.33 % from 110 votes. More jokes about: animal, dinosaur
A Liverpool docker went to South Africa for a job. The boss tells him, "Its people like you we want here. Here's a test. There's a revolver, go out and shoot 6 niggers and a rabbit." The docker asks, "Why do I have to shoot the rabbit?" He got the job.
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has 64.33 % from 181 votes. More jokes about: racist
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