Best jokes ever

What gas do snails prefer? Shell.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Big inspection on a build site/yard. The boss tells the workers : what ever happens just act as usual. The inspection committee were inspecting when a wall just colapses. -(Worker looking at his watch) : 10:15, just on time
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: life, time, work
Two goldfish are in a tank. One said to the other: "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
Jerry is charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquits him. Later that day Jerry comes back to speak to the judge that tried his case. ‘Your Honour,’ he says. ‘I want to get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of mine.’ ‘Why?’ asks the judge. ‘He won your acquittal. Why do you want to have him arrested?’ Jerry replies, ‘I didn’t have the money to pay his fee, so the bastard went and took the car I stole.’
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
A man runs over a cat. The cat’s address is on its collar so the man goes to apologise to the owner. He knocks on the door and a little old lady answers. The man says, ‘I’m so sorry. I’ve just run over your cat. Can I replace it?’ ‘I don’t know,’ replies the old lady. ‘How are you at catching mice?’
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Apparently Neil Armstrong use to tell unfunny jokes about the Moon, and followed them up with "Ah, I guess you had to be there."
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
Q: What's a hipster's favorite profession? A: Mortician. All of his work is 6 feet underground.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: death, hipster, work
Chuck Norris was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible. He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldn't make any sense.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris
"Doctor I feel like biscuits!" "What, you mean those square ones?" "Yes!" "The ones you put butter on?" "Yes!" "Well, that means you’re crackers!"
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
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