Best jokes ever

Apparently Neil Armstrong use to tell unfunny jokes about the Moon, and followed them up with "Ah, I guess you had to be there."
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
If you can't say something nice, say it in French.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: life
Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: car, Chuck Norris
Guys, enough with the Asian jokes...they're all the same.
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has 64.77 % from 339 votes. More jokes about: asian, racist
A man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at a fast-food restaurant. He noticed that they had ordered just one meal, and as he watched, the older gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries until each had half of them. The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap. The young man decided to ask if they would let him buy another meal for them so that they didn’t have to split theirs. The old gentleman said, “Oh, no. We’ve been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared 50-50.” The young man asked the wife if she was going to eat, to which she replied, “Not yet. It’s his turn to use our teeth.”
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: food, marriage, old people
Q: Where's Spiderman's home page? A: On the world wide web.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: internet, technology
Q: How do you kill an emo? A: You don't you let depression do the work.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, work
As a child, I was afreid of ghosts. As I grew up, I realised people are more scary.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, vulgar
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