Best jokes ever

What did one Christmas tree say to the other? You've got a lot of balls walking in here dressed like that.
Vote:
has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Christmas
A bloke walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar that reads, "Cheese sandwich: 0.99; Chicken sandwich: 1.50; H*ndjob: 20.00." Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, the man walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three hot waitresses. "Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile. "Can I help you?" "I was wondering," whispers the man. "Are you the one who gives the h*ndjobs?" "Yes," she purrs. "Indeed I am." The man replies, "Well, go and wash your hands. I want a cheese sandwich!"
Vote:
has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What is the difference between a blonde and the local football team? A: The blonde has the higher sperm count.
Vote:
has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dirty
You have got to be kitten me!
Vote:
has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: kitty
Man, to woman, ‘Am I the first man you ever made love to?’ Woman, ‘You might be. Now you come to mention it, your face does look familiar.’
Vote:
has 64.79 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"
Vote:
has 64.79 % from 202 votes. More jokes about: food, men, sex, time, women
What do you call it when one bull spies on another bull? A steak-out.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
How are men like noodles? They're always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: men
Q: What is height of De-hydration? A: A cow giving milk powder.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
How do some men define Roe vs. Wade? Two ways to cross a river.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: men
<<<496497498499
More jokes →
Page 496 of 1427.